inner demons: halloween 2002
| inner
demons 2002 |
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| [the project] |
this EP was my first attempt at releasing original music. i composed, performed, recorded, and mixed this album in a span of about five weeks during september and october 2002. |
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| [the process] |
i went to hear jennifer terran sing at noe venable's house last month. this night was the beginning -- of something -- i went alone to this concert. i knew that i was supposed to be there and maybe even more important was that i was to be there alone -- to face my fears & to start that scary walk to the-places-you-know-are-inevitable. they were both so beautiful and engaging that night -- and as out of place as i felt (and probably looked), i stayed. i listened. i absorbed. i did have a connection to these people. and the very next day, the songs started showing up. lyrics, melodies. it was frustrating trying to understand why there was such an onslaught of music all at once, but i figured it must have been for good reason. so, i let the songs form. and they were all just so sort-of-off-color, that they seemed to be calling for a halloween release. so, i set off on the perhaps ridiculous trek to release my first cd (ep, i guess) in about 3 weeks. writing, recording, mixing. none of which i had ever really done before. here is the point where my friend josiah york-carr shows up. surely kismet, we cross paths after many years of estrangement and just at the right moment -- josiah was looking to do some production work & i needed assistence (and a vote of confidence) on the project. so, josiah ended up recording and producing the first two tracks on the cd. i was left to do the rest myself. i decided to use a recording of part of a song-cycle i taped a year earlier -- partly because it was already recorded and partly because it fit perfectly into the eerie, spooky theme i was compiling for the cd. the other four songs entailed me running from my computer to my mic, back and forth for hours (my sister is so kind for letting me overtake the living room for those two weeks). we recorded all the songs through a mixer (mackie dfx-6) and directly onto my harddrive. the final recordings do suffer from this technique, but i had no other options at that point in time. it was a learning experience and i had decided then that the songwriting was most important to me, and that the recordings were second in priority. josiah mixed tracks one & two at his house, while i mixed my four tracks with pro tools on my super-old macintosh. andrew enberg came in and saved two songs with his brilliant percussion. he is unbelievably talented and generous enough to spend a couple hours helping me out. check out his music store in davis, ca. and hear his band, weird harold. |
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| [art] |
bryan machowsky was gracious enough to allow me to use a piece of his art for the cover of the cd. his entire richard simmons collection is hysterical (moving, phenomenal, introspective), but this piece best captured the mood of the cd. bryan darling took time in his busy schedule to layout the cd artwork; he also allowed me to use a photo of his as background for the lyrics. he is also the photographer for the photos on my photo page. andy hilal is a fantastically smart fellow who not only designed/hosted my old webpages (this page is actually from his design), but walked me through setting the current grahamsobelman.com -- ¡viva Andy! thank you guys.
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| [the tracks] |
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| [track
one] |
i emailed my friend dario campos to see if he would write me something fun for the CD. that afternoon, i had the full lyrics to "hit song all over you" -- within minutes the full song just created itself. the original actually uses all the lyrics and was played on piano. for fun, i tried it on the keyboard, and decided it was too great as an 80's pop song. josiah rearranged some parts and we re-recorded with some extra sounds to get to the current version. the original may show up again, probably in concert, since i hate playing keyboards live. | |
| [track
two] |
josiah worked on this one too, making the men's choir sound pretty rockin'. this was the first of the songs to be written (except "the rest") and led the way with its free-spirited form. somewhat basic, but taking turns when it felt it needed to do so. people kept asking me what style of music i was writing -- and i would think of this song and think, "i have no freakin' idea." | |
| [track
three] |
how romantic to be an indian conquered by a cowboy? i couldn't think of a better way to tell a love story on halloween. andrew helped me with percussion on this track. i tried to do some shakers but it sounded like sh...so i thought i'd have a real percussionist come in. | |
| [track
four] |
i wrote a song-cycle for soprano & piano in 2000 (the only other totally finished, original music project i've ever done). i used five poems by a lovely lady, susan kinsolving, to compose a five-song cycle called "momentous forces reduce to minute degrees" -- sarah price performed and recorded all of those. "the rest" always seemed like a weird, nursery rhyme to me, and i thought it would fit perfectly with the rest of these songs. | |
| [track
five] |
last song written for the album. started out as a legitimate love song, but then turned on me. hate is so much easier to sing sometimes. that doesn't mean, however, that we can't use pretty melodies to convey such emotions. the recording on this track got really airy, but i liked the piano/voice on it too much to try to duplicate the performance with the time constraints that i had. | |
| [track
six] |
based on true events. unfortunately, the week that i recorded the CD, the neighbors actually started to lighten up, so i felt sort of bad singing this song with only a thin wall separating our duplex. but then i thought, if they ever do find out about the song, what a good LAUGH we'll have! | |
| [track
seven] |
chopin's raindrop prelude seemed like a perfect way to end the cd. meloncholy and creepy in its own way. i thought it would balance out track one's modern qualities. | |
| [the
lyrics] |
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| [track
one] |
HIT
SONG ALL OVER YOU [words: dario campos; music: graham sobelman] it's oh so fitting you have no brain as the best of you goes down the drain and even then is it the best while a clump sticks to your chest you say: "don't worry, we can make more so much we could slip on the floor" and well why not? it's what he knows he's got and it isn't much, but the fun is such that you'll not care about back-hair so do the whole dozen who cares if he's your cousin 'cause who needs mentality when there's salacious physicality calling at your godhead yanking on your godhead saying baby, you make me feel so gay and it's enough to make you feel so gay and by the way, I love it when we're gay "in the very very month of May" and well why the hell not? it will be exactly as I thought in the shower, every hour so do the whole dozen who cares if he's your cousin... |
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| [track
two] |
TWO-BIT CLOCK [words/music: graham sobelman] once i found two dead birds, motionless on a rock. feathers plucked, but even more absurd: one mouthed "tick" one mouthed "tock" no, "la, la, la... ...la, lie" another day i found more, aside the road picked up a block. a closer look: a tiny door, teeny knobs to a two-bit clock, that went, "ta, ta, ta... ...ta, ti" what good does a door without a house? it only opens out. you can hear the people inside, singing softly, never loud "di, di, di... ...di, die" |
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| [track
three] |
VILLAGE PILLAGER, BE MY COWBOY [words/music: graham sobelman] people say the past was just the past but i've heard lovers' stories that did last men took wives to help them guard their gold fighting for their lives took every day for they had not yet figured how to play taking things from others was more bold 'cause i know how the West was won cowboys riding after injuns, fun! you can chase me 'cross the valley zigzag patterns leading to the sea freezing from the wintr'y nights did toll and shelter did not shimmer from their souls warmer were the teepees from the cold food could not be found among their feet the natives had survival to a tee you stole it, ate it, then it could be sold 'cause i know how the West was won cowboys riding after injuns, fun! you can chase me 'cross the valley zigzag patterns leading to the sea take me by force, uproot every tree that's the life i want, that's the life for me. people tell me "leave the past the past" but i think modern love just dies too fast tell me that we're in this side by side my love for you might be a little strange i see our sunset glowing on the range pillage me, my village & let's ride! |
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| [track
four] |
THE REST [words: susan kinsolving; music: graham sobelman] As murderers sleep through the night with their hands limp and open, the empress snores with the soft wind coming in the palace windows. As soldiers and schoolgirls sleep deeper than the dark weary animals who curl into the dead trees, the sick float past their bloodstreams into an evening of smooth lakes. As doors do not creak and insects keep silent, the watchdog is deaf to all but his dreams. As infants forget that they have left the womb, the old forget that they are still alive. As the longest night endures, history closes its eyes for the rest of the world. |
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| [track
five] |
PIECE OF ADVICE [words/music: graham sobelman] if i tell you i cannot sleep, it's not because i am thinking about you if i tell you i want to travel far away, it's not so i can call you from there and say: i miss you, i need you, you complete me if i tell you to step in a little closer, it's not so we can share an embrace if i tell you to let me know where you are, where you are staying, just in case: i miss you, i need you, you complete me... you're wrong, so wrong, so off the mark. i just want to find you, and hurt you, and then most of all forget you. so, if i tell you to leave your sweater at my place, you know it's not so that you will return and if what i've said is too hard to face, it's just so that you will finally learn: don't fuck with me |
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| [track
six] |
THE LANDLADY'S NIECE [words/music: graham sobelman] she moved into the house the grounds are not the same the grass out front grew weeds on the very first day she came pretty girls don't carry the ire that this one does Happy Meals come with tears now salted diet-coke, as it was the landlady's niece my god, what a piece and then she sings: la, dee, dee i'm finally free from the new york city i feel pity for about two hours maybe 3 hours at the most i heard her complaining today scraping the burn off of her toast she's banging on all our walls her kid's crying so she'll hear i wanna stretch that diaper from her arm up to her ear the landlady's niece my god, what a piece and then she sings: la, dee, dee i'm finally free from the new york city why is she so angry? why can't she just enjoy? it's California for god's sake not mid-state Illinois grow up and get your own place so you can disturb the peace we don't want you here, we don't like your face but we don't want to lose our lease so you should get out, get out nepotism is how wars have begun get out, get out before i do something you wish i hadn't done get out, get out the landlady's niece has not yet won |
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